Overbooked, Overscheduled, Oh!

Dash's karate kick!

Months ago, back at the beginning of the school year, I made a personal decision. Now that I had two kids in public school, which comes complete with the shorter days that make a working parent's nerves twang, I had to make a concession. Either my kids would come home from school and watch TV until 6:30 when I arrived, then quickly shovel dinner in and finish homework before they dropped; OR, I would shorten my hours so that I could be home when they got home. I shortened my hours.

When I first envisioned the extra two whole hours balancing away in my work-life scenario, they seemed like golden, glittering minutes, full of promise. I could choose after-school activities for the kids. I could go to the gym. I could get all those to-do lists of home-chores done. We could gambol in the yard, go for hikes, schedule playdates! So, you smart people, you already know the reality, don't you?

What really happened at first is that when I got home earlier, the chores started immediately, dinner happened much sooner, and then TV and homework and collapsing. No gamboling, no walks, no hazy crisp fall afterschool playdates. Perhaps what was wrong here was a lack of structure, I thought. I started to schedule activities.

Rosie and Dash were already taking tap and ballet classes on Wednesday and Saturday, respectively. Last summer, we added Saturday karate for Dash, while Rosie did Japanese calligraphy. They were also taking afterschool soccer on half-day Mondays, but that ended at 2pm and Grandma S picked them up (thanks, mom!!). Of course, I have my modern dance class too, on Thursdays. This winter, we added art classes for both Rosie and me on Saturdays and Mondays; soccer had ended, Rosie dropped calligraphy and I took a break from dance just for home-life balance with the art class. For Dash, we added a language class on Wednesdays, Spanish, and for Rosie we added Junior Jazzercise on Thursdays, which just ended. The Winter-term art classes just ended, as well. Have you lost track yet?

Here's how things look at the moment:

• Monday: nothing
• Tuesday: nothing
• Wednesday: Spanish, tap 
• Thursday: modern dance
• Friday: nothing
• Saturday: karate, tap
• Sunday: nothing

Only three days booked? My brain fired: must schedule MORE!!! What did I do? I signed the kids up for Gunston Soccer Club, a local competitive league. I sure had my rose-colored glasses on, because I thought that since some close friends who have kids (the same ages and genders as mine) were also registered, that all I had to do was request that we have the same teams for our kids and it would happen! I imagined carpooling and sideline flask-sipping with adult friends while our kids frolicked happily around the soccer fields.

Reality hit when I got their coach assignments and details about the league.  A gut-punch to the stomach: neither child was on our friends' team rosters. Carpooling? Out the window. I only recognized one parent's email address from either list. But the freak-out really happened when I saw the scheduling... Thursday practices for Rosie starting at 5:30 (with an optional Tuesday clinic), and game day Saturdays; Friday practices for Dash (at a different location) at 5:30, game day Saturdays—each child would have two games back-to-back, with times scheduled by luck of the draw. With two kids, you could potentially be at the soccer field for most of Saturday, worst case scenario.

What was I thinking? Dash already had two Saturday activities! And while Rosie likes soccer well enough, she wanted to continue with art or Jr. Jazzercise, which are scheduled on Saturday and Thursday, overlapping. This is a very popular soccer club! How do all the other parents do it?

In tears, I emailed Dash's coach and told him that I wished to withdraw Dash, sight unseen. He was very nice about it, even trying to offer scenarios for me to keep Dash in the club. I stuck to my message and said no, again and again. He finally got it and took Dash off the roster. Instead, I put Dash back into the Monday afterschool soccer, where there were no conflicts. Rosie will stay with Gunston for now—I'm curious to see how the club works and whether it's manageable for future seasons.


A quick recap of schedule to be (four days scheduled):


Monday: Dash, soccer
Tuesday: nothing
Wednesday: Dash, Spanish; Rosie, tap
Thursday: Rosie, soccer club practice; me, dance
Friday: nothing
Saturday: Rosie, soccer club games (starting 4/9); Dash, karate & ballet
Sunday: nothing

I've still got ideas bouncing around in my head. I want Dash to try the track team and Rosie to get back in art. I'm not sure this soccer thing is going to work, but if she likes it, that's what counts (I know Dash loves it). I'm here to give my kids opportunities to try different things and see what they're good at, learn to use their bodies and minds, practice and develop. I'm helping them become well-rounded little people.

But, y'know, I still need to be able to schedule a haircut for myself now and then. 

I think I'll need a clone come November 13th.

(Stricken text taken from Leonard's tattoos in the 2000 movie Memento.)

Never answer the phone. How will I keep track of all this?

Fact 1. Male. November 13th is Rosie's 8th birthday. She has invited a select group of her friends, mostly from her 2nd-grade classroom, to go ice skating (thankfully, outside the home).

Fact 2. White. The ice skating party falls squarely over the lunch hour, so I'll be catering lunch as well as cake for the party. Solution: Pizza delivery services will help with this one, and I've asked a party guest's parent to make the cake.

Fact 3. First Name: John or James. Dash's karate class and his dance class will both be overlapped by the birthday party. Solution: We will do a make-up class later on for karate and a parent of one of Dash's playmates will deliver him to dance; Monkeyrotica will pick Dash up.

Fact 4. Last Name G___. Monkeyrotica has a dental appointment that overlaps Dash's karate and the beginning of Rosalie's party. Um, yep. And I scheduled it, I sure did.

Fact 5. Drug Dealer. Monkeyrotica's birthday is tomorrow (if you read my blog and you feel like it, wish him a happy day on 11/5!) and we are ALSO having a party for him (with his select guests) later in the afternoon on November 13th (yeah! two parties on the same day!!). Monkey will be prepping barbecue for it starting the night before, before and after the dental appointment, and all the way up till his party. I'll drop Dash off at his playmate's house and head to Rosie's party after he leaves for the dentist and will be back to help two hours before it starts.

Fact 6. Car License Number SG137IU. Um, I think I need to take Friday, Nov. 12th off! I'll be delivering birthday cupcakes to Rosie's classroom that afternoon and will very likely need the whole day to get the house ready and obtain supplies for the weekend.

I'm disciplined and organized. I use habit and routine to make my life possible. Between now and then, I'm planning to unpack the basement, make Rosie and Dash each a Totoro doll (already started), and maintain the entire house in a presentable state for guests. I keep telling myself:

"I can fit it all in! Of course, it'll all work out in the end and everyone will have a great time."

I'll be repeating that mantra in my head all the way until 11/14.

The 2010 Dance Recital Videos! Now with more Dash!

The Dance Studio's recital theme this year was "Written Works," with our four dances referencing Eric Carle's "Hungry, Hungry Caterpillar," Marcus Pfister's "The Rainbow Fish," Roald Dahl's "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory", and Gregory Maguire's "Wicked." Apologies in advance for the focus issues in the 1st two; we are getting used to a new camera...

Dash's Dance, Pre-Ballet (adorable little preschoolers!): "Fuzzy Wuzzy Caterpillar"


Rosie's Dance, Introductory Ballet (1st graders) "The Rainbow Connection"


Rosie's 2nd Dance, Introductory Tap (1st graders): "The Candyman"


Nylonthread's Dance, Modern (teen & adult): "Defying Gravity," Glee

Dance Studio Photo Day!

(Sorry in advance for this long, long blog entry!)

Hey, I don't see any dance photos here! What gives?

Let me explain. If I had a split second, or perhaps a clone of myself with me who could wield a camera on Saturday, I would have taken a few photos. I didn't.

This was my day, June 5, 2010:

10 a.m. After breakfast and getting everyone dressed (Dash in dance clothes) & ready to head out the door, Rosie's calligraphy kit in hand, Dash's dance bag ready to go, we were off!

10:30: Arrived at Seichou Karate, where they teach Japanese calligraphy and Karate! There was a Karate class at the same time as calligraphy, did Dash want to try? Nope, he'll just watch. However, after the stretching and warm-ups were done and the Sensei was teaching punches, Dash announced, "I think I'll try now!" This is my only photo from the entire day. I swear, he had just been kicking like a champ!

11:30: We rushed off from Seichou, to get Dash to ballet by Noon.

Noon: My 1st trip of the day to the Dance Studio, to drop off Dash. Rosie and I headed home so she could get lunch, then I arranged her ballet bun with many pins and hairnet (thank goodness I had a bit of foresight!), then on with her leotard and back to the Studio for her class.

12:45 pm: 2nd trip to the Studio. Rosie's back-to-back ballet and tap classes started, then I got Dash home to eat his lunch. Now was the time I decided to try his dance costume on and see how it fits. I knew it was way too big, but did I alter it ahead of time? Nah, why not procrastinate instead! I measured and pinned his clothes, then set up the sewing machine. It fought with me, I adjusted settings, then had to leave the house again.

2:30: 3rd trip to the Studio to pick up Rosie. One other student hadn't been picked up on time and the photographers were setting up their equipment. Mrs. H was anxious that the parent wasn't coming in time. I offered to take Rosie's friend and get in touch with his mom via her cell, but was turned down. We headed to RiteAid to pick up some hair accessories, then took a side trip to pick up my costume from a classmate who had offered to do my alterations, then sped home. There, I got back to work on Dash's costume. It needed the pant legs taken up about 8 inches and the sleeves about 3 inches. I got the legs done, and Monkeyrotica came to warn me that "it's now 3:15, aren't Dash's photos at 3:45?" I finished the sleeves by hand-stitching with a loose baste, then threw the entire costume on the boy (white and baby-blue!) and arranged his hair with some hairspray. We left.

3:40: 4th trip to the Studio, for Dash's photos. It was a madhouse. The room was full to the brim with costumed ballet dancers, parents and siblings. Mrs. H popped her head out of the curtained studio to make announcements every few minutes. I put Dash's black socks on and slid his black ballet slippers over them. Somehow, I missed the call for his class but shoved him through the curtain just in time. I peeked in on him now and then, but parents are prohibited behind the curtain. At a few minutes past 4, I realized that Rosie's photo session is at 4:15 and Dash was nowhere near done!! I asked another parent to keep an eye on Dash until I'm back as I rushed home to gather Rosie's two costumes, all their accessories and get her dressed, all with no time to spare.

4:10: 5th trip to the Studio, with Rosie, her two costumes, and my dance bag. What? We needed her dance bag, with her ballet slippers inside! I phoned Monkeyrotica's cell, guided him around the house to try to locate her bag. He found it and agreed to drive it to the Studio. I went inside with Rosie, gave her a bit of lip gloss, tossed her tap costume in the dressing room, and asked her to stand with her classmates. I grabbed Dash, got his street shoes back on and took him outside with me. Monkey pulled up (the parking lot was also a madhouse), I grabbed Rosie's bag from him, and informed Monkey that he was taking Dash. I buckled Dash in, tossed his dance bag in the front seat and they were on their way. I pushed my way through the press of people to where Rosie was, jammed her slippers on, and shoved her through the curtain with her class. Whew! I found Rosie's friend Margaret in the dressing room, changing by herself, with a full ponytail, not a bun. "Margaret, sweetie, do you need help? Where's your mom?" I asked. "My dad dropped me off," She answered. I popped back in to the waiting room and Steve waved at me. "Would you like me to help with Margaret's ballet bun?" I asked. "Please!" he answered. Stepping back into the dressing room, I set eyes on Rosie's tap costume and realized that there were pieces missing. OMG-crap-crap-crap, I thought! Her tap photos were in 20 minutes. I ran out, apologizing to Steve.

4:35: 6th trip to Studio, with costume accessories in hand. I had completely forgotten that Rosie's tap costume had little wrist bands and a long ribbon that needed to be shoelaced through little slots all down the back. I started lacing like a madwoman. I finished just in time to get the costume on Rosie, then remembered that she didn't have standard tap shoes (needed to match in the photos). We borrowed a pair from Mrs. H's stash. 4:55. Kids' photos, done! Rosie and I went back home.

My class' photos were next, but at 6:45, so there was a little time to spare. However, it dawned on me that we were going out that evening and had hired a babysitter, my neighbor's kid. The house was a scandal. Dishes were everywhere on all the tables, stacks of them in the sink, food left out, soiled socks and clothes abandoned in the hallways and bathrooms (quick changes necessitated this), scraps of random debris all over the floors! I worked up a sweat unloading, loading, and running the dishwasher, bagging laundry, sweeping, stashing food away, etc. By the time it was all acceptably picked up (not cleaned, who has time for cleaning?), I had 3o minutes to fix my hair properly, do my makeup, remove all nail/toe polish, get costumed and head out the door. Oh, and with the kids in full costume. See, I had my heart set on having a portrait of the three of us together, all in our recital togs. Who knew if or when this might happen again? One or more of us might opt out of participating in coming years.

6:40: 7th trip to Dance Studio. My class had our group photo taken. I was irrationally angry at a teenager in my class for having chipped black polish on her nails and toes. There were strict guidelines sent out weeks ago about no jewelry or polish. I'm sure she had all the carefree-teenager-time in the world to remove it—unlike me—but I managed to anyway. Oi, listen to me, I'm being a freak. I beckoned the kids to join me and I realized that I didn't have Dash's bag with his ballet shoes in it. Remember where I put it? Monkey's car. Thankfully, Mrs. H had a spare pair that fit perfectly. We gathered with the photographers and they posed us. I was instructed to kneel on one knee (on hard-wood floors! ow-ow-ow!) while Dash sat on my bent leg and Rosie stood behind him.

We posed for three photos as a trio and I'm crossing my fingers that they turn out fabulous!! I'll post them when they are shipped, in 4 to 6 weeks, I'm guessing.

B, the sitter, arrived and we went out for the evening, off to wish our lovely friend Liz a wonderful birthday at a bar downtown. Wheee! I sure needed to celebrate after such a long day.

Dash's dance class

The Dance Studio that the kids and I take classes at had open studio this week and I was able to see all the technique that they've learned this season. Dash's class of 3 and 4 year olds was soooo adorable to watch. The teacher is terribly ingenious at getting the smaller kids to try the moves, by introducing imaginary play that mimics the ballet poses that they need to learn. I'm very proud of Dash's abilities, he did so well!

In this photo, the dancers are lining up in twos and threes to travel, learning step-hops or skate-step in unison or with the beat of the music. Dash, with his shaggy unkempt bed-head, is holding hands with Genevieve, a friend from his daycare. I swear, some of the parents sent their girls in with professional hair-dos! The blond in front had a halo-style French braid sprinkled with glitter complete with glitter accents on her eyelids and cheeks.

Dash is waving to his audience and loving galloping around the room (they pretend to ride horses, which teaches chassé) to all end up twirling into an improvised pose at the back of the room. One girl has already chosen a lunge-type pose, while the rest are still in motion.

Here they are at the barre, learning tendus. Notice that Dash is looking confidently forward, while the other students are either looking confused, watching him, or getting direct instruction from the teacher.

He is going to be such a great ballet dancer, I can tell! I do hope he continues with the practice; there are so few boys in the upper levels. We tell him that there always needs to be a Prince in the traditional ballets, right? Who will the ballerinas have to perform with?

I wonder, at what age should I consider taking him to a ballet performance? I'm not sure he'd sit through one at this age...

Ballet Rehearsal 2009

Ballet Rehearsal 2009
Originally uploaded by nylonthread

Christopher, Ava, and Rosie were very patient while waiting for the dress rehearsal for their beginning ballet class to start. They're sitting in the auditorium at a local middle school, where the recital is taking place. Aren't their costumes adorable? They were very excited about it and performed well! I can hardly wait for the recital next week. And out of 175+ students in the school, Christopher is the only boy. Keep it up, little man! Ballet needs the male dancers. (Note: It's hard to tell in this photo, but Rosie lost her second baby tooth earlier that day. My girl's getting so big.)

My pal Kristine (Christopher's mom) videotaped Rosie, Ava, and Christopher's dance; however, I didn't point out to her specifically that Rosie was three dancers to the right of Christopher, so we only see her arm or foot in the frame once in a while.


She also taped my modern dance from Act 2. I didn't ask her to, but I'm glad she did. Even though it was just the rehearsal, I think we looked pretty good! The music is "Come Home to the Sea" by Mannheim Steamroller. We've been learning this dance in pieces, over a few months. This will give me an idea of what I need to work on before this coming Saturday. Of the six dancers in my class, two are teenagers, one who is the same age as me, and two who are in their 50-60's. See if you can tell which dancer is me.