Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Work-friends ≠ going-out-friends

There's a lovely person that I work with, almost a "work spouse" if you will, that I share projects with, take coffee breaks with, and generally feel a little empty if they don't make it in that day. Honestly, though, we don't have much in common outside work. We were chatting about our weekend exploits and she mentioned that her friend took her to some awful bar downtown that she'd never go to again. I go to a lot of awful bars downtown, so I asked her to give details.

Location? "Oh, off 14th, near some letter streets, but not in Dupont Circle."
Type of bar? "All ages, and really scuzzy."
Music? "It was supposed to be an 80s music dance night, but it was awful alternative stuff, nothing I recognized at all. I think of Journey when I think of 80s, you know?"
People? "It was full of all the worst, ugly, nerdy losers that never got picked in gym class! They actually called out a guy who'd been coming there every night for eight years and was celebrating his birthday that night. Who goes to the same bar every night? What a LOSER!"

It dawned on me: she was talking about my favorite, scuzzy, dance venue, all-ages bar off of 14th Street. Black Cat. I know most of the bartenders there by name and used to be a regular when we lived a few blocks from it.

I just celebrated my birthday there.


  1. there's no accounting for taste, eh?

  2. Yeah! When she started in on the bargoers, I really got defensive. Those are my peeps! Not that anyone who was there knows me or even knew me when I was a regular. Us ugly-nerdy-losers-that-got-picked-last-in-gym-class don't have the best social skills.

  3. Nerdy losers that never got picked in gym class? Huh. That's an interesting put-down to use. Very Pretty in Pink. Are we supposed to be Ducky or Molly Ringwald? And she's, I guess, James Spader?

  4. Geez, you mean there's still people who all these years later hold it against me that I go picked last in gym class? Too funny.

    I've only met two or three work friends over the year that I hang out with outside work. It's just very different hanging out with people socially than in a work setting. That said, my best bud at work is also my best bud outside work...maybe that's cause she was probably also picked last in gym!

  5. The last three kids to get picked for kickball teams were the fat kid, the kid who didn't speak any English, and me.

    And you know something? Bitches be throwin pussy at me. THROWIN.

  6. It's interesting when you realize one day that the people you are really close to at work, you really have nothing in common with outside of work. Work is a weird artificial society that impels us to form weird, artificial relationships. Hmmm, I think there's a blog post in there somewhere..stay tuned

  7. I'm going to this place. RIGHT. NOW. It sounds awesome! ANd maybe I will go every night up to and including my birthday in 5 weeks!

  8. Kelly O: I really don't think she had any idea how much she was alienating me permanently, right then. James Spader, ha!

    Mary Lynn: Our office had a survey last year that concluded that people who were happiest at work had a "best friend" that they worked with. You're lucky!

    Monkey: Dear heart, I picked you to be on my kickball team. FOREVER.

    XUP: I'll look for your post! Happy to create blog fodder for you anytime.

    Spleeness: Let's GO!! This weekend!! But, isn't you-being-in Flagstaff going to be a problem? :-)

  9. That last Horrors show at Black Cat was definitely full of nerdy losers, though. But not the cool nerdy losers. They were the nerdy losers who were clearly trying to hard to not be nerdy losers. And only three girls were dancing even though the music was pretty danceable.

  10. I find the whole thing shocking because you all have so many venues that she couldn't remember the name. Denver is hip but not so filled with clubs that they become unnameable. There's two kinds: meat markets and the places we frequent with comfy chairs, good martinis and the musics not so loud that you can't hear your date.

    Also, I'm fine being Molly Ringwald.


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