Dancing in my fabulous dress!

I loved, loved, LOVED dancing with Monkeyrotica and other dear friends at Karen & Bryce's wedding. Mark Zimin DJ'ed, and I just had the best time ever, dancing to Mousetrap music. I'm wearing the dress that Monkey bought me for our wedding anniversary last month. Isn't it gorgeous?

Oh, heck, I was just beside myself at how awesome it was to be out in downtown DC, in the evening, dining and dancing with my beloved peeps. Monkey had to drag me out of there; I wanted to dance all night.

Ten Whole Years!

Today is the tenth anniversary of my wedding with AJS. Back in 1997, I had long, dyed red hair and had lost 20 lbs so's I'd look fabulously glamorous in my wedding fotos! Ten years later, many short hairstyles, and two kids later, my hair is long again and I have those 20 lbs back. (I'm okay with 10 of them.)

Less than a year after we were married, we bought our first house, in a "gentrifying" area of Washington DC. We loved our house, but it was pretty uncertain there at night; lots of drug-dealing, mugging, and break-ins went on. After dark, AJS would meet me at the Metro, rather than let me walk home alone. We made some really good friends in that neighborhood, many whom we still are in touch with today.

Our life back then centered around bars, clubs, restaurants and going out with our friends. We loved that we were walking distance to most of our favorite night spots, The Black Cat, Metro Cafe (which has been gone for YEARS, yet still has a website?), Polly's Cafe, Fox & Hounds, The Big Hunt, Townhouse Tavern, Velvet Lounge, 9:30 Club, Common Share, Lucky Bar, and later, Saint-Ex. For years, we religiously went to Mousetrap, a monthly DJ night at the Black Cat, because our friend Mark was the DJ, we knew our friends would be there, and best of all, AJS would dance with me. Before Mousetrap, AJS never danced, but when we were there, he'd be dragging me onto the dance floor! I love you, AJS, for always dancing with me at the Black Cat.

Our friends got together for a weekly "game night" that started in 1999 and went on for a year or more. Different people came and went, but there was a core group that was always there. After the weekly died out, Molly picked it up and made it monthly. A few of our friends were in bands (The Meat Joy, Squatweiler, Rose) that played local venues and we did our darndest to make every show. We always had lots of house parties and were invited to our friends' parties, so we felt busy, and loved. We went on a few vacations to the U.K. (photo in Dublin at left), New Orleans, Mackinaw Island in Michigan, and Phoenix (Tempe, AZ, really); I loved our early married life.

When we had Rosie in 2002, we were the first in our group of friends to have a child, or as Ed put it, "you're the first people I know that had a planned pregnancy!" Our life started to change. While I was pregnant, AJS became a regular at the Black Cat's Red Room. His nickname with Billy (the homeless doorman outside, "Change for the homeless, Black Cat, Black Cat") was Mr. Smooth, the bartenders would have his drink ready on the bar before he sat down. Not able to drink, I was rarely joining him.

After she was a few months old, Rosie was an easy baby to take to parties! We'd bring her along, everyone would coo over her, then she'd fall asleep in her car seat no matter how loud the party was. So, we'd just tuck her away in a bedroom and spend a few more hours out. She went to so many parties!!! For Mousetrap, we'd drop Rosie off at my parents' house, head into DC for some dancing, then bring her home. As she grew, our outings became more limited and mostly because AJS was paying attention to the housing market, he decided it was time to leave the city (our noisy, careless, renter-neighbors helped the decision). Pure genius, AJS!

Rosie celebrated her first birthday in our new house, Dash was born about two years later, and we've lived there for four years now. AJS set up our own bar in the basement, and we have a perfect house-party house, with an excellent deck out back. Our trips to bars, clubs, and restaurants are pretty infrequent these days, but we are staying entertained by the goofy antics of our kids and regularly visiting friends (especially Kelly O! BFF!) and family on the weekends. Just this past weekend, we had dinner parties on Saturday and Sunday.

I'm so glad I'm married to you, AJS! You are loving, caring, clever, creative, entertaining, and a wonderful husband and father.

Counterpoint, in a fashion

During college, I began to be frustrated with the dating scene. And, it may come as a surprise to my parents, but I was becoming aware that my dad worked with several young men, good-looking, well-paid engineer types who were single, and also had contact with the upstanding well-educated male children of his colleagues.

After some frustratingly bad dates, I started thinking, wouldn't all this be easier if there were arranged marriages? My parents could identify a good match for me, I'd be set financially (potentially), and I'd have much less worry and effort to put into the whole soul-mate-searching thing.

Then, I put that out of my head. I had the right to marry whom I wanted, and I ought to exercise that priviledge! I found my life partner, and later this year, we will be celebrating 10 years of marriage, 15 years together.

I'm saddened that the government isn't allowing a random selection of Americans (10%?) the same choices and options that I have.

Freedom to marry week

If you know me at all, you know that I don't pay much attention to the politics stuff, despite living in DC and metro area. So, this just comes straight from the heart.

I married who I wanted to marry. If somebody had suggested to me that I couldn't marry my chosen, I would have been righteously pissed off. The fact that people are doing just that today does upset me a great deal. Are we in the dark ages? In India or other third-world country, with
arranged marriages? Just where do all these people come from, that they think they have the right to keep other human beings, Americans even, from pursuing happiness? Married couples have different rights to benefits than singles; why shouldn't any couple who are living together and committed to each other get those rights and benefits? Seriously?

I don't think it's right or fair. I could say more, but I know that I'm not being terribly eloquent here and I haven't read other essays or brilliant rhetoric on the topic to bolster the range of my argument. So let's just hope that I do just that and if I post again on this topic, I'll have something more, um, thought-provoking to say.

The good and the brain-dead

Well, Dash has been walking for almost two months now and he's getting really good at it! Which means that while he's still in the infant room at daycare, he looks and acts like a very short toddler (throwing off prospective families who tour the center). So, I talked with the center director and they'll be transitioning him to the toddler room on May 15th!

This center has only been operating for two years so far and they told me that, at 10 months, he is the youngest child in their history to move up so early. But everyone agrees that he's ready. His best friends are turning one and moving to the toddler room so we think he would be sad without them and bored with only babies around. Not to mention, such a mobile child could potentially be a hazard to really young babies (he's very sweet with them though).

On to the brain dead. I was putting away some winter woolens in our cedar closet that holds seasonal items and clothes for specialoccasions and came across something shocking. Taped to the plastic garment protectors that cover some of my most expensive evening dresses was -- get this—a beebee gun target. With holes shot through it. And holes shot through the plastic garment protectors. *&^@$#!! Ever since we moved from DC (guns illegal) to Virginia (guns legal) AJS has been buying, repairing, and eBaying beebee guns. So, he was testing one of them out and shot from across the basement into the cedar closet. He was NOT even thinking. Do guns make men turn into 10 year olds? AAAArrrgh! Luckily I don't think there's hardly any damage to the fabrics (many dents in vintage velvets), but OMG.