Thursday, November 06, 2008

How not to celebrate an anniversary

This past September, Monkeyrotica and I celebrated our eleventh anniversary. And by celebrated, I really just mean acknowledged (on my part, mostly). He bought me a gorgeous dress that I was surprised and thrilled about (and he got... [crickets chirping...] get back to you later). But man, this September and October? It was such a total bust. For various reasons (related to the economy, maybe? maybe???) I was absolutely freaked out and cancelled many plans. The anniversary dinner was just one of many things that I promised to reschedule.

We did dress up and go out on October 11 for a black tie wedding and I got to wear the dress!! It was so fabulous, I forgot that going to somebody else's wedding doesn't really count as celebrating your own anniversary.

So (this list assumes you're in charge of your family budget), here are some notes, so you don't screw up like me for your anniversaries to come:

1. Months ahead, put some $$ aside just for your spouse's gift and dinner.
2. Set a date for your dinner, & if you have kids, book a sitter at least four weeks ahead (and put some $$ aside for that too).
3. Make a reservation at least two weeks ahead at a restaurant you both like or are wanting to try.
4. Set a fabulous outfit aside a couple of days ahead, with accessories (if, like me, you are hiding in the bathroom 15 minutes before you're supposed to be leaving while you are making custom jewelry for our outfit, your spouse will not appreciate it).
5. Check with the sitter the night before to confirm; confirm with the restaurant too, while you're at it. Couldn't hurt.
6. Leave enough time to get to the restaurant at a leisurely pace.
7. If you can view the restaurant's menu ahead of time, get an idea of what you'd like to order.
8. Whatever your meal tastes like, DON'T COMPLAIN! If your spouse is anything like Monkeyrotica, any complaining will ruin, RUIN the entire experience, done, game over, try again next time. If it's easily fixed, catch the waiter on your way to powder your nose. If it's really just not right, make up your calories with a fabulous dessert.
9. ABOVE ALL, enjoy being out with each other! If you don't have kids yet, savor your time alone and linger. If you do have kids, try to talk about other things. It's tough, I know. Imagine that you have other personal pursuits, life dreams and goals and focus on them. Listen to your spouse.
10. Pretend you're on a first date. Play footsie! Sit next to each other and neck a bit like teenagers. You deserve it and it's fun!

I'm thinking I'll be able to make this up to him in December, possibly January. I'm working on #1 and #2.


  1. Apropos of nothing, I was doing the usual ironing/dressing/making lunch thing, when I had this kinda odd feeling. Not deja vu, not a premonition, but this funny feeling that this was how I was going to die. It'd be before sunrise and I'd be in the kitchen doing some mundane task I've done a million times and I'd kiss you on the forehead and peer in on the kids sleeping and I'd just be gone. And it was more of this kind of peaceful feeling rather than sad but, really, there's much worse ways of shuffling off this mortal coil. I mean, yeah, I'd rather go out banging the $h!t out of my wife, but as deaths go, quietly croaking slicing an apple isn't the worst that could happen.

    Anyway, you know what I like for anniversaries/birthdays, and it doesn't cost you anything but a little dignity and a towel.

  2. My anniversary just passed (July) but I'll definitely be revisiting this post sometime in April or May. Maybe I'll send this link to WifeRat and maybe this will be the year I get an anniversary gift.


  3. Woof, I think our last date night was... oh man, it was the lamaze refresher course almost 3 years ago. I so suck. Stuck in the mindset that we're too broke and I show my love (besides the usual verbal and physical ways) doing all the crappy jobs around the house, which is true, but not good enough. Thanks for the reminder, 'course with the next tax deduction due Dec 21 we're both too tired to even sleep let alone get dolled up and go out. I just want to share a seriously powerful alcoholic drink with the poor girl. Damn fetal alcohol syndrome.

  4. Wow, some folks don't regularly exchange gifts or go out on their anniversaries? Sorry, I know it's true. I really look forward to any excuse to go out and exchange gifts, seriously! It's just that I procrastinate and then I miss the date.

    Tell me what your best anniversary was, please! Ours was our 2nd, I think when we spent a long weekend at the Grand Hotel on Macinaw Island, Michigan. That was one to remember. Lately, we've dined out for the last few at Restaurant Eve. NICE place.


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